IN TOP NEWS TODAY:
The Lunch Ladies have infiltrated New York by swimming upstream through the Finger Lakes, crashing Ithaca Fantastik Festival Festival headquarters, and securing a selection.
It's no secret New York has been on orange alert for the past year, diligently patrolling its borders in an effort to keep out the notorious duo. Unfortunately, Ithaca let the whole state down by overlooking their unprotected shores:
"We had no idea those Lunch Ladies were so good at the breast stroke. We apologize to all fellow New Yorkers for our oversight. We are horrified."
Said Seretta, pulling leeches from her legs acquired in the strenuous journey: "You should've seen those programmer's faces when we showed up in their offices dripping wet, wearing our bikinis, wielding harpoons. Never underestimate the Lunch Ladies."
LouAnne, wrapped in a ratty Navajo blanket to ward off the last of her hypothermia: "It was super cold, but worth it. Thanks Ithaca Fantastik for the selection!"
The seventh annual Ithaca Fantastik Festival is a ten-day film, art, and music festival that takes place from October 26 - November 4.
Details on when the Lunch Ladies screen can be found HERE!
*Breaking news: The New York Post just reported that the Lunch Ladies demanded the state put a hairnet on the Statue Of Liberty - concerned citizens have rioted the governor's mansion.
Follow Ithaca Fantastik Festival at:
Twitter: @ithacafantastik
Instagram: @ithacafantastik
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